22 7 / 2014

Unlike others,
Ours is different
For it lasted
only for sometime.

It was hard for you,
To let go of us
But it was harder for me
It wasn’t easy setting you free.

I didn’t love you,
You could say that.
I know that’s what you feel
Because I left you with answers unreal.

One day, love,
You’ll understand
Why I have to leave
Why all of a sudden you have to grieve.

I wasn’t ready.
I’m sorry I have no bravery,
To face tomorrow with you
And fill this world with hue.

I was terrified,
That’s why I have to cry
Because moving on,
I have to try.

I’m not worthy for your love
So I’m sorry.
I can’t go back
I’ll just bring you sadness,
And your heart would be lock.

You are so good to be true,
And I can’t hurt you.
I’m finally going
Leave everything behind.

You’ll understand
Why I said goodbye,
Why I have to lie.
You’ll understand, love
Why our hearts
Could never tie.

Note: This was written 3 years ago. So forgive me if it’s not very good. I don’t want to revise it so I’ll be able to know where my passion had lead me and how far I have evolved. So yeah. There it is.

22 7 / 2014

How selfish the ocean

to take you away.

Like shore waves reclaiming the sands.

Keeping every grain compact

In it’s glass jewelry

drooping from it’s neck.

How cryptic the masks and curtain

Of grayed gloomy skies.

Hopeless it makes you,

so wimpy and frail.

How bounteous

These nimbus streaming tears

of farewells and fate.

Oh, you clever little soul,

Spoke of fable, of love and war.

Your vulgar feign professing devotion

Of our mighty and favored chronicle.

How brave you sunset

To descend from the mountains,

From the sea

That once owned you.

Come and see

How tenacious the heart gets.                                                       

Safekeeping bruises and scratch.                                                 

Sculpting dull edges, suturing scars.

"How does it feel to lose you?"

Such rhetoric question..

Oh, how selfish the ocean

to take you away.

How light and free

my heart floats in the open air.

It is like hearing goodbyes for a lifetime,                                                    

said all at once.

29 5 / 2014

Tonight you are the song playing in my head. Every possibility of falling down, you fight to drift your car away from each bend. Every 1 or 2 minute gap of your message reaching me, is a proof of time being consumed.

We sing to the song playing on each plugs. Same rhythm, same lyrics, different ears. This is new, the first we ever listened to the same song. Neglect the fact that I told you to, but we are of two body embraced by one sonata.

No stars, no moon to come be our witness. Together, we are alone. In this fog you said to be pretty. The world is asleep for this moment of loudness and our eyes are awake in the silence of our hearts.
One more city and you’re near. Road after road, traveling light. And as of me, here in my bed in the middle of darkness, my thoughts begin to wander in a place of small lights, fuel, brakes, clutch. In your car. Seeing the fog with your hazels, singing a song of your voice. Smiling, laughing in the front seat with you near your hands. I get lost in this moment of dreaming, of wishful thinking.
One more hour and this moment stops. Faster than I expect it to be. My lids are heavy and my pillows are likely brushing my hair, silence singing me a lullaby.

“You must sleep”, you hesitantly said. But I told you I’m wide awake.
“I’ll stay awake with you until you reach home. ‘Til then I’ll close my eyes.”

The truth is my mind’s caught somewhere far, but my heart is still with you. There is no tomorrow in this. And I am afraid of not having enough time with you. Tomorrow you might leave again, you might leave for good. Tomorrow might be the end or we might not even reach the sunrise.

Tears are prayers as well. They may or may not be answered. But still they fall, sadly. This might be gone the next day. When all is over, and tomorrow is today, you should be going, I know.
We listen to the music dearly playing. I only have this moment. Sleepiness starts to drift me away.. So fast that I reached the further before I even know it.

So tomorrow is today, and today will be yesterday.. Drifting away.. Far.. Maybe it’s to time to go.. Slowly disappearing before your eyes. Front seat getting empty.

A simple sign of complexity. You send me messages but I am talking to you. Goodbye.. Here as I close my eyes in my own four- cornered room.. You drive your thoughts away of me, of us.. I only have that. It’s gone now.. There might be no you when I open my eyes the morning I say Hi to the sunlight.